If you know me in real life, you know without hesitation my mind’s eye addiction to murals, derelict buildings, graffiti, youth and animals. I am a people watcher. My eyes are open wider than normal. People, places and things are always catching my attention. I am a loner and I stick close to my family and friends.

When I was a kid I hated school and I hated my teachers even more. Mean sons of bitches! But they taught me what I don’t want to be like. I flunked out of school but went on to get a degree.

I constantly have a traffic jam in my brain. New ideas are always creeping up on me, awake, asleep doesn’t matter.  And my energy can move through things like lightning. ‘They’ say the youth I work with are A.D.D. but I think it’s because they hang around me too much. In my universe, youth are the sun and everything and everybody else rotates around them. I don’t break away from my ethics and moral values, especially since I work in an environment that is absolutely not conducive to my personality. I believe that one's actions speak volumes. I just shrug my shoulders and throw up my hands because everybody has a right to express themselves without judgment or criticism. And they can have their own drama.

When I was a kid, we traveled from one end of Canada to the other by car. Windows rolled up, my brother’s father smoking one cigarette after another and the four of us squished in the backseat fighting.

All my life I struggled with my identity, as if I were walking on the outside of life. Either I was not ‘Indian’ enough or too ‘White’. If it doesn’t matter to the youth I work with why should it matter to anyone else. I am a dam proud Métis. And I have been blessed with two cultures. I have had to learn to deal with it so will everyone else and if they can’t, that’s their problem and they can kiss my ass.

When I was young, I pretended to have ADD because it sounded better than admitting to daydreaming and it was so much more comforting than what my reality was. Every time I start to feel sorry for myself, I think of all the shit my mom’s been through, worked at, put up with, survived, sacrificed, and accomplished.

I think Brad Pitt is overrated and Louis Riel is underrated. If Paris Hilton can be famous and not know what talent is then I am going to be a fucking star!

When I was young, I hoped one day to have a daughter and I did. She is like me, but better at everything.

Winnipeg is a city where I just feel at home when I arrive.

When I was a kid, I used to make collages out of photos I took and staple them to my wall. It drove my mom nuts!

I spent a lifetime training in gymnastics and putting up with leotards that wanted to creep up places they shouldn't. And I have spent almost another life span teaching it. But after 28 years of coaching I have decided to cut the strings and pack it in. Sticking your leg behind your ear when you are young is hard enough, never mind still trying to do it at 43.

I come from a family of self-proclaimed experts in ridiculousness, who are accustomed to silliness, random mockery and complete stupid humor. We are not easily embarrassed, especially not by my brother Darcy’s weirdness in public. I am lucky to be surrounded by these beautiful people!!!

When I was young, I thought berry picking with my grandma was a good time and I still love spending time with her.

At times I feel a bit lost in this life. A sense of longing or homesickness for something I cannot identify. Disappointments from my past simply don't matter anymore. I wish I could divorce my emotions.

  
deedee